Social Media is Killing Our Creativity!

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One morning as I was walking into my shed, excited to sip a pot of coffee, (yes–I said it….a POT, but it’s decaf, so don’t shoot me), I was struck with a thought so profound to me that I had to start writing: social media is just like fashion magazines, and it’s killing our creativity and confidence. 

Let me back up a moment and tell you what’s been going on and why this was such a poignant thought.

You see, I recently confessed in a podcast that I haven’t been feeling creative lately. That may not strike a chord in you because, while you enjoy creating, it’s something you do leisurely….something you do when you have time…something that feels good on a Saturday afternoon in between kids and the daily grind of life.

But for me, it’s become my income; if I’m not creating, I’m not earning.

It goes deeper than that, though. 

Listen to this post in Episode #148 of my podcast! (Find more episodes HERE).

 Losing Sight of My Purpose

Creating is one of my three life’s purposes: CREATE, INSPIRE, and TEACH. And I haven’t been doing much of any one of those things lately. I can’t remember the last time I even painted a piece of furniture.

At the beginning of the year, bloggers and makers just spent the prior month counting down their top 10 projects for the year, while I am sitting here wondering, “Did I even do ten projects that year? Did I only do three projects that year?” Either way, that’s not very creative, inspiring, or educational.

My YouTube channel sat stagnant, collecting cobwebs, creeping along at the pace of a tortoise. My channel’s views were so insignificant that potential sponsors told me, “Reach back out to us once your channel starts to grow,” or things like, “Nope, we won’t work with her because her views appear to be inconsistent.” Little did they know, I’ve been in this game since 2012.

Now, granted, the caveat to this rejection is that these are companies I didn’t really care about in the first place. And no, I don’t really care about peddling their product.

I was only being pitched to them because I had recently signed up with a brand management company in hopes of creating more branding opportunities since my sponsorship opportunities seemed to dry up like the pond in my neighborhood thanks to extreme drought conditions.

It felt like I had been kicked back to 2012, when this blog and channel were merely “toddlers” and I was hoping to land my first brand deals, but was told I wasn’t quite “there” yet; that my page views and “influence” weren’t quite ready. 

And now, 12 years later, I started feeling like a “senior citizen” blog and channel that has well been established, with plenty of experience, tales, and success to spout, but I’ve been aged out by the newer, more flashy content that draws attention, likes, and shares.

I felt like Thrift Diving was dying a slow death, right in front of my eyes, because what I was doing…..and how I was doing it….wasn’t seeming to make a dent anymore.

It wasn’t that I needed 10,000 likes. 

It wasn’t that I needed to go viral.

But I needed to feel that what I did mattered. And unfortunately, when I’d post something that I’ve put my heart and soul into, and it “only” got 10,000 views over 6 months (sometimes less), it felt like rejection.

I remember the day when something similar would get 10,000 views in its first couple days. Or even better. The world could see my enthusiasm for that project, and it responded in kind, spurring me along to create my next project, which would fuel the creativity to do my next project.

It was a wonderful cycle…..until it wasn’t.

(PROJECT: Sewing Desk Makeover with Pink Stain!)

And I can’t say where the breakdown happened. It’s sort of like the slow unraveling of a marriage, when you look up and realize it’s been deteriorating for years. Or when you try to slip into your favorite jeans from college and wonder when you’d gained so much weight over the years. You can’t pinpoint one particular argument. You can’t pinpoint one particular meal.

For me, it was a compilation of many things: not doing enough projects that sparked joy…taking too long on projects (like my friend’s outdated bathroom makeover that took 4 months!!) that resulted in not posting enough…feeling lonely working alone so that I “wasted” much of my day reaching out to friends for connection, which resulted in me not getting enough done…issues at home…All of those things played a part in me dialing back my output. 

But I realized something else that has been so significant: social media has been killing my creativity and confidence.

And while social media may not be the cause, it surely hasn’t been the cure. Let me explain.

Is Social Media the New Fashion Magazines? 

As I was standing at the workbench that morning preparing to make my coffee, a profound thought struck me: “Using social media is like staring at fashion magazines all day.”

Let me repeat that: “Using social media is like staring at fashion magazines all day.”

Okay, you might not have read magazines…..you may be a dude reading this who has never had a desire to crack open a fashion magazine ever (but, okay, you may have read health magazines)…..but just bear with me here as I explain this poignant thought, because it affects every single one of us that uses social media, whether you grew up reading magazines or not.

Magazines were a huge part of my teen years, namely Marie Claire and Teen magazine. I scoured the pages looking at pretty girls, wishing I looked or felt as pretty as them. I didn’t think my body was as great as the models splayed on those pages. I surely wasn’t as happy. When I read over my teenage journals from that era (and yes, I still have them all), my biggest grievance was that I was bored. My love life certainty wasn’t as interesting as those girls; I was too tall, too ungainly, unpolished, tom-boyish, and my self-esteem was shaky at best. There were no boys ‘a knocking.

Reading these magazines was not going to make me suddenly confident, beautiful, feminine, popular, attractive to teen boys. If anything, these magazines only highlighted what I already didn’t think I was.

 In fact, it’s been well studied and documented that “women who viewed fashion magazines preferred to weigh less, were less satisfied with their bodies, were more frustrated about their weight, were more preoccupied with the desire to be thin, and were more afraid of getting fat than were their peers who viewed news magazines.” (Source)

And while this statement speaks to “women,” we can rope in young girls. And likely young boys who have read health magazines, wishing his abs were a 6-pack just like those on glossy pages.

But here’s the crux of my point:

Knowing how detrimental staring at magazines were for us as young girls or young people, imagine staring at magazines for nearly 3 hours everyday. That’s the average amount of time that people spend on social media per day. Nearly 3 hours. (Source)

When we read fashion magazines as young girls, we were flipping through maybe an hour or two per month. I mean, I don’t have exact numbers on this, but you remember what that was like: lying on your bed, scanning and reading, fantasizing, taking it all in, ripping out your favorite articles so you could share them with your friends. Maybe even circling and highlighting the parts you wanted to remember or try out. 

But when you were done with that magazine, you were done until next month. You might have briefly flipped through again here and there. You might have read more than one magazine. Your confidence and self-worth were sucker punched, but then it was over, you mildly recovered, until the next month you anxiously pulled the next edition from your mailbox.

(PROJECT: How to Reupholster a Bench)

The Algorithm Is Now the “Editor”

It’s different now. Every single day (not monthly) we’re bombarded with images, fast-moving clips, with a never-ending feed, serving up more of what the algorithm thinks we want. And the algorithm is usually right, with uncanny accuracy. And it’s sending us the same messages that magazines used to send us: we’re not pretty enough…creative enough…thin enough….rich enough…smart enough…our house isn’t big enough…our marriage isn’t loving enough. WE.ARE.NOT.ENOUGH.

But now, it’s not just our own thoughts thinking these things; there is social proof of it. Here’s what I mean: Someone posts a picture of their living room, colorfully decorated in an inviting way. It looks amazing! It’s everything you’ve always wanted, down to the layout of the room, the vaulted ceilings, the skylights, to the perfect artwork. Everything. That photo got 10,000 likes. The algorithm decides that 10,000 is pretty strong proof that that living room is something more people interested in decorating and design would want to see. So it releases the image to even more people….and more…until it’s clearly now considered “viral.”  It has edited everyone’s perception of what’s “in,” what’s “popular,” what’s “worthy” of reaching more people. And when we all “like” and comment and agree that it’s great, it sends the message to the other posts that get 20 likes: “This isn’t worthy of sharing; it’s not good enough.”  

(ARTICLE: 10 Ways to Decorate Your Home Like the Pros!)

So how does that exposure affect us and our views about who we are, where we live, what we have, what we don’t have? Sometimes it’s obvious, when immediately after looking at something on social media, you look around your own room and wish for better, especially if it’s something you’ve been unhappy with for a while. 

But I think the subliminal messaging it sends us is so much impactful, and we’re not even aware: “My home is boring”…..”I’m not creative enough to make that like she did”…….”Everyone else has such better ideas than me”…..”I’m not as charismatic as them, so I could never do that on camera”….

(ROOM MAKEOVER: My Family Room Refresh!)

The messaging goes on and on. And because we see how many views and likes something has, it sends us the message as “social proof” that reinforces the subliminal messages we’re imbedding into our subconscious.

The Bright Side of Social Media

Now, I do believe there’s a lot of good that comes out of social media, yes. I enjoy the connection that social media enables, especially with people who have similar interests. Social media allows you to find your “tribe” of people, to share ideas, to laugh together and more. It has allowed us to try new recipes for our family. We’ve learned “hacks” that we may never have thought of on our own! It has allowed us to solve problems (thank God for YouTube tutorials!), discover new artists, new comedians who otherwise may have never gotten a shot on stage at a comedy club. Life is better with social media at our fingertips.

Social media has allowed me to live out the other two pillars of my life’s purpose: INSPIRE and TEACH. I have inspired thousands (millions, perhaps??) to do projects around their homes, to learn to use power tools, to paint old dressers, to make home affordable. But I have always tried to keep my content as down-to-earth as possible so that it feels doable to everyone. I have included mistakes, missteps, vulnerabilities, project doubts, and more, in order for you to know that whatever you see here…it’s not perfection. I’m not more creative than you. I run into mistakes, too. I think this is an important part of social media so that we don’t feel that everyone is “better” than us. We all have flaws and imperfections. And being vulnerable enough to share that for the world to see is important.

(PROJECT: How to Make DIY Roller Shades!)

“You’re Not Enough”

As beneficial as social media can be, unfortunately, most of the content online sends the opposite message: we’re not as pretty/creative/smart/funny/popular. And if social media can send these negative, subliminal messages to our brains, just like fashion magazines did (and do), why are we spending nearly 3 hours every day subjecting ourselves to it?

But there’s another side that people don’t consider: To even admit that these images and videos on social media are negatively impacting us, can make us feel like we’re weak; as if only a “weak person” would allow an image or a video to make them feel bad about themselves….right? As a result, no one wants to admit that social media may be killing their self-esteem, self-worth, relationships, feelings of competency, self-reliance, or happiness.

And yes, social media may be killing their creativity, too. Because, “Why even start a project that can’t possibly turn out as good as that person on social media? I think I’ll just continue to watch other people do amazing things online, because they’re more creative/smart/talented than me.” 

I don’t think we consciously make that decision, but unconsciously, my opinion is that we are making decisions everyday based on these thoughts.  

Some people don’t even know that these subliminal thoughts are being planted in their subconscious and impacting how they spend their time and what they decide to do or don’t do.

Being Mindful About the Effects of Social Media

I feel like I’ve always known that social media was killing my creativity and confidence, but it wasn’t until that morning that the thought struck me so profoundly that social media is like magazines. And if magazines were so detrimental to me as a young teen on my self-confidence and self-worth, isn’t social media doing the same? How ludicrous would it be for me to read magazines for over 17 hours a week, bombarding myself with images and articles, telling me how I should look, dress, act, be….. So why should I spend over 17 hours a week allowing an algorithm to push images and videos to me, telling me what’s popular, what’s creative, what’s socially pleasing and acceptable? I shouldn’t. And neither should you.

Worrying about how we measure up against the “social media ruler” of likes and views can cause anxiety, and as we’re learning, anxiety kills creativity. It affects our ability to simply create with blinders on, based on our own desires and joy, without the fear of not amassing “social proof” that our creativity is worthy of going viral; without the subliminal messages of “This isn’t going to reach many people; it’s not good enough for that.”

I’m not afraid to admit that these things have impacted me. I’m not afraid to admit that being paid for my creativity based on how many views it could get and how much engagement it can get, has caused me to second-guess myself. I miss the days when I was excited to just do a project because, “OMG, this is such a great piece of furniture!!!” I miss the days when paying my mortgage wasn’t tied to how many people “liked” my projects. I miss the days when people gathered online and simply enjoyed connecting without an algorithm being the gatekeeper on who you engaged with. I miss the days when I could introduce myself at the beginning of videos (“Hey guys, what’s up! It’s Serena again from ThriftDiving.com!”), as if we’re old friends, instead of being told that the first 3 seconds require a “hook” in order to get people to stop and watch. I miss the days when people would just stop and watch because they couldn’t wait to see what Serena was excited to post about that day.

I sound just like a “senior citizen” blogger. HA! In fact, we in the blogging community do have a term for us. We refer to ourselves as “OG Bloggers.” Well…..at least I do. You know, like Original Gangsta. I often wonder where many of my OG bloggers are–the ones that started back in 2012 when I did, when we all crowded together at the Haven Conference, an annual DIY blogger conference in Atlanta, and wondered how to do this “blogging thing.” Where are they now? What are their thoughts on blogging and content creating, as it exists now?

Where Do We Go From Here?

You might be wondering, “Okay, Serena….so how does this affect me? And what’s the conclusion to this blog post? Where are we going from here?” Well, great questions. I think the following things should be considered:

• How do I feel after I’ve been online? – Do you feel motivated or depleted? Did you learn something that improved your life, or did you feel like it was just a time-suck filled with doom-scrolling that made you feel like you just wasted the last hour and a half? How you feel afterwards is a good barometer for whether you’re wasting too much time online.
• How much time am I spending actually creating versus watching other people create online? If you find that you’re spending way more time watching others be creative than you’re spending doing your own projects, then it’s time to turn it around. Use social media as inspiration, but then at some point, turn it off and go work on your own projects. Get ideas, but then go try them out for yourself, instead of just saving posts to try later, which you rarely do.
• Shut out social media for a while. Yes, this includes Pinterest! Go pull some of the recipes you’ve been wanting to try. Go pull some of your saved “tips” from how to paint furniture and start applying them to a new project of your own.

Going Back to the “Basics” 

As I wrap this up, I feel like this blog post feels like I’m taking it back to the beginning days of blogging, where I could share ideas, thoughts, observations. That’s how I originally started. In fact, I started way back at the age of 5, journaling before I even knew how to write, making squiggly lines on pages and pages in notebooks. That’s what I’d like to do again: I want to write.

I want to express my ideas, without worrying how many likes, comments, or shares it gets. I want to continue to be authentically Serena. I want to scrap writing for Google and write for you. Write for me. I want to do “passion projects” that have been on my bucket list, and then post the tutorials and lessons learned for you. And if a brand decides to come along on that journey, great. If not, don’t let the door hit them where the good Lord split them. 😉

In this world of likes, shares, and comments, as great as social media can be, we’re losing the cozy feeling of connection. I’m feeling nostalgic for genuine conversation. I want to slow down and enjoy content again, instead of feeling like I have to be a content machine to keep up. I want to fall back in love with Thrift Diving, which is who I am to the core: a lover of all things thrift; a lover of paint; a lover of power tools; a lover of inspiring people to also be creative; a writer; a lover of sharing ideas and introspections.

I hope you’ll stay along for the journey. I can’t promise you it will be worthy of 10,000 “social shares,” but if it touches your heart, makes you smile, makes you feel connected to me, to this community; and if it inspires you, then it was worth it.

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